I am so sleepy… I guess my bed felt so good to me… I couldn’t bear to leave it. I was right in the middle of that sleep where it feels like you could lay there for days. I felt like slapping my alarm clock like it stole something from me… but here I am – exhausted. I’m rambling – so let me get to the point of today’s blog. The other day, I was entrenched in a deep conversation with a friend of mine, SpottieOttieDopalicious.
Spottie is the type of guy who always gets wrapped in the person he’s with. He always thinks she could be Miss Dopalicious. It can be a pain talking to him… but like the dutiful friend I am, I listen. So, anyway, like clockwork, Spottie starts talking about how great his girl was: Man, I luhvs dat gul… she is one cup of Grade A wonderful… she can burn in the kitchen… she cleans up – in a wife beater, boy shorts & stilettos… did I mention she was a freak? I luhvs her, man… I think I wanna marry her… After his rambling (on and on – I think it was some hours) about the greatness of his phenomenal woman, he drops this bomb on me. Man, if she is cheating on me, I don’t wanna know… after that he sounds like Charlie Brown to me (whompwhompwhomp-whompwhompwhomp); because I’m still focusing on what he just told me.
I don't wanna know
If you're playin' me, keep it on the low
Cause my heart can't take it anymore
And if you’re creepin’, please don't let it show
Oh baby, I don't wanna know
- Mario Winans
That song just popped into my head as Spottie was spitting his nonsense. What kind of BS is that? You don’t want to know?!!! [I think I almost bust a blood vessel from being so incredulous about him being so love-drunk and oblivious] You’re investing time, effort and energy into someone and you don’t want to know?! If you find a condom in the house (and you’re allergic to latex), you don’t wanna know how that got there? You’ll probably make up an excuse like: Tae – that nucca is always losing stuff… Ladies, what if you find some panties in the house that ain’t yours, you don’t wanna know? Nucca, whose panties are these? I don’t know… they ain’t yours?
Think about it – do you want to one day be blind-sided by an admission of infidelity? Yes, I f----d her… I f----d her… is that you want to hear, yes, I f----d her…but I make love to you… I’ve heard stories of people getting caught red-handed, leaving their beaus with the “it wasn’t me” story. Is it that hard out here for a pimp? People, you are more than capable of landing someone that is focused on you, not you, me and her.
I don’t care she has some bomb-azz p***y or if he can lay pipe like a plumber… it’s not worth it if they are sharing their services with other consumers. Tell me… I want to know – everything. Educate me… hell, let me know and then let me go… so that I can roll in piece. Close your nose and open up your eyes and ears… I promise you’ll benefit in the long run… If u ever have to question your relationship or your partner`s loyalty, then something just ain’t right. Follow your instinct. Your intuition will guide you. There is a reason why you`re feeling like this. Get out before the funk hits the fan and you’re a part of Trapped in the Closet, Pt. 74: Hot Grits and Bacon Grease. Let me know if you're feelin' me or if I'm way off-base.
Gotta run and pack – making a road trip to holla at