Monday, July 13, 2009

Smart Music Mondays, 17.



Happy Monday, Folks!

Hope all is well...

Back in the groove of things once again and with that, I present an all new ill mix from DJ Rahdu!

BLS iTunes Shuffle: Dew.in.is (Compilation)

Listen up when you get a chance....



Click To Download or Right Click And Hit Save As


While you're at it, feel free to vote for your favorite Mr. Smart Guy (if you feel so inclined) in the 2009 Black Weblog Awards.
Click on the picture to vote!


My site was nominated for a Black Weblog Award!



ALBUM OF THE WEEK
Sade - The Best of Sade



I won't even do this album justice by trying to review it. It's a masterpiece...

If you like mellow R&B/jazz, you'll love this.

Get ready to groove...



My Personal Picks.
Cherish The Day
Nothing Can Come Between Us

Tracklisting and joints after the jump.

TRACKLIST
1. Your Love Is King
2. Hang On To Your Love
3. Smooth Operator
4. Jezebel
5. The Sweetest Taboo
6. Is It A Crime
7. Never As Good As The First Time
8. Love Is Stronger Than Pride
9. Paradise
10. Nothing Can Come Between Us
11. No Ordinary Love
12. Like A Tattoo
13. Kiss Of Life
14. Please Send Me Someone To Love
15. Cherish The Day
16. Pearls

ENJOY!


Click To Download

Thursday, July 09, 2009

A Time Out on Time Out.



What’s up, everybody? Hope your week has gone well thus far; mine has been a bit up and down due to allergies and whatnot but I'm maintaining. It's not all bad as to keep my sanity, I’ve been writing and getting reacquainted with my old friend, television. It's been awhile OK, last night since I flipped on the ol’ tube but I’ve been making up for lost time (let’s just say – my electric bill just got a little higher).

Nevertheless, while channel-surfing; I ended up watching Good Times... who just happened to be home to the happiest people in the ghetto, the Evans family. These folks were always so daggone cheerful, cracking jokes and whatnot.

Did they not realize they were in the projects in the middle of Chicago?!!!

This is the city where I was born and raised for the 17 years of my life and every time I've had the misfortune of the opportunity to speeding quickly through there be in the area, the only time I saw smiles was from the semi-nude drunk vagrant singing to himself in front of the fiery garbage can.

I'm digressing – so I’ll get back on track.



This particular episode, cast a not-quite-nasty yet Janet Jackson as Penny, the precocious little neighbor - who was getting the brakes beat off her reprimanded by her mother for lying (and for really just being born). She ended up getting saved from this madness by the Department of Children and Family Services (and Willona, the next-door neighbor who never stayed at her own damn apartment).

I know this makes me sound really slow, but when did ass-whippin' become a crime?

So what Penny’s mother used an iron to prove her point?
You call it abuse, I call it productive.

I bet you one thing: Lil' Penny was REAL slow to tell another fib!

Society has cast upon us the thought that it’s wrong to spank your child and it can mess up their psyche. Forget that nonsense – time-outs are for sporting events only, not for ornery rugrats. In the words of DJay (from the illustrious cinematic feature Hustle and Flow): whoop that trick!

I was raised under the adage: spare the rod, spoil the child. Mama Sharon used to lay those hands on me whenever I thought about getting out of line. She even had a look. She would scrunch up her face real tight (like she was constipated); bring her eyes to the tiniest of slits and bite the insides of her cheeks. I swear that look caused me instant diarrhea a lot of stress from the fear it would instill in me.



I figure it was that way for most parents back then: after THAT look came into play - playtime was over.

The scenario:
They would talk to you for some ungodly amount of time, telling you how wrong you were and how they were doing this because they loved you. Personally, I think this was to soften the kid up for the kill. When they finished the lecture, they would always end it with these words: THIS IS GOING TO HURT ME MORE THAN IT HURTS YOU.

My thought was: OK, how about we trade places then? I couldn't have on my conscience for you to be hurting like that.

This would end up with the kid, crying a river of tears, snot and drool and rubbing their sore butt.

Nowadays, these brats contemplate turning in their folks in to the child abuse services (you know the hotline trying to help kids out of beatings nationwide). I almost called those folks on Mama Sharon once – but I swear I heard her yell out to me: "I'll give you a REAL reason to call those folks if you even THINK about making that call!"

All jokes aside, I appreciated the "tough love". I think I turned to be mostly normal (although I’m still a little swollen on the backside), well, at least, I’m not TOO crazy.

Let me know about discipline was handled while you were growing up and you plan on discipling/currently discipline your children.

Thanks for listening to me ramble – that's my two cents. See you next time!

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

5 Tips To Help You Cheat....And Get Away With It.

by Kommen Sinse

This has been nagging me for quite a while. Cheating and getting caught. Now I don't condone cheating by any means because I believe in karma. [Only in the area of relationships.] Time after time after time, I see idiots getting caught because they don't use a little common sense. If you're gonna step outside relationship, cool. You may have all the reasons in the world for doing so; none of which I care to hear, but in the end you are still wrong. Hopefully some of these tips will help you get away with it, with your cheatin' heart! become an effective cheater. I got all these tips from females. I've always said they are better at doing this shit than we are.
Tip #1

"If you gonna cheat, find a ho that don't live in the same city. Matter of fact, make sure that bitch is 2 hours away." When my friend told me this, I had to laugh. She broke it down in a way that you had to be there to see it. You take whatever city you live in and get a map. You mark your house on the map as the center point. You figure if ya girl is gonna come look for you she's gonna hop on the interstate cause it'll get her to wherever you may be quicker. If she's pretty predictable when it comes to driving as far as speed that's good. Take the Speed Limit, say in this case the highway speed limit is 60mph. In 2 hours if she maintains that speed, she'll travel 120 miles. That's your mean distance. If she's a 10 over the limit type of person, right there you have 140 miles in 2 hours. That's max distance. Always account for bullshit to happen, so 100 miles in 2 hours is the minimum. Now ring those distances out and there you go. If you're prone to go hang with the boys and be gone for long stretches in a day, the chances of her noticing and caring are minumum. Give her that courtesy call so she feel's special, and keep it moving.


Tip #2

"Sanitize." How many times have you left receipts, phone numbers, etc. in your pockets? That the incriminating evidence out of your pockets. Women go through pockets, because 9 times outta 10, you picked the week to cheat when she feels like doing laundry. What it the enemy of jeans? Ink pens. So women go through our pockets to make sure nothing in out pockets fuck their shit up. Save yourself he trouble by getting rid of it before you get in your car. This includes emails, IM's, and texts. You're kinda screwed on phone calls because those can be printed on the bill.*

*Even if you take it off the paper bill, the numbers still show up online.

Tip #3

"Wash your ass!" This should be self-explanatory. After you have sex just don't wash your dick off in the sink. If the rest of you smells like shit, but your dick smells like roses, what is that gonna tell you girl? It's a lot easier to explain why you smell good, than trying to explain why you only had time to wash your dick. [Sidebar: By following this tip it saved my boy from an almost immediate bust.]

Tip # 4

"Use a condom." You don't want this chick you were creeping with to turn into your baby momma. Also, if she knows you gotta girl, who's to say she ain't doing the same thing you doing? Diseases are out there and the biggest one is pregnancy. Because if you get the creep boo boo preggers....she will definitely become a disease. Save yourself the drama, and wrap it up.



Tip #5

"Keep it short ans sweet." If you are creeping with this girl and do so for an extended amount of time, girlfriend #2 will eventually want to be #1. When she has in her mind that she should be the number one lady in your life, believe she will make her prescence known, and start marking her territory. And when she starts marking territory, she will start doing bolder and bolder things.

"This one dude kept me around so long I though we were married. I got treated like I was his one and only so I figured, that other bitch had to go. I started being more aggressive and keeping him out later and later. Calling his voicemail and leaving messages of me playing with myself. I stepped my shit up." - Anonymous


Now, I'm not saying these tips are foolproof (we all know how a dude can fuck shit up), but they all seem like pretty common sense shit to do if you're gonna be doing wrong. All of these tips were told to me by women, so these are the things they are lookng for. Every last one of these tips were simple steps overlooked by many. Like I said, I don't condone it....but if you're gonna do it. Do it right!

That's my time.



REST IN POWER
Steve McNair
February 14, 1973 - July 4, 2009

Monday, July 06, 2009

Smart Music Mondays, One Six.



Happy Monday, Folks!

Hope all is well...

Back in the groove of things once again and with that, I present an all new ill mix from DJ Rahdu!

DJ Rahdu - Total Wreck: The Encyclopedia of Bahamadia

Listen up when you get a chance....



Click To Download or Right Click And Hit Save As


While you're at it, feel free to vote for your favorite Mr. Smart Guy (if you feel so inclined) in the 2009 Black Weblog Awards.
Click on the picture to vote!


My site was nominated for a Black Weblog Award!



ALBUM OF THE WEEK
Anthony David - Acey Duecy



WHave you ever noticed that most people don't catch onto certain things until they are dropped upon their heads like bags of heavy bricks from the tops of the highest buildings? Then and only then, in that moment of clarity, do the objects of focus become so apparent that hindsight not only lends 20/20 vision, but also spotlights that which blinded us from seeing them in the first place. With that in mind, let us focus on the career of soul singer Anthony David.

He wrote "A Part of My Life" for Acoustic Soul, India.Arie's multiple-GRAMMY-nominated album, and supported the album on global tours as a background singer. His first project, 3 Chords & the Truth, was hailed by the Atlanta Journal Constitution as "the best record to come out (of Atlanta) since Usher's Confessions." His second album, Red Clay Chronicles followed up that greatness however without major label support, however, the world turned a deaf ear.

Hindsight, as a consequence, is 20/20, and Acey Duecy is a "grand debut" that shines like a polished gem on India.Arie's newly-christened Soulbird label. The album, in all respects however, is a "greatest hits" compilation of David's first two independent releases. With that in mind, new and old fans alike can appreciate the selection of "Words" (featuring India.Arie) as the lead single, which is an ultimate testimony of true friendship and the long road to a major label record deal. Now, with the release of Acey Duecy, the stars in the musical universe have finally aligned.

To me, Acey Duecy brings real music back—with a vengeance! The album is all substance, without standard-grade filler or commercial gloss, and devoid of manufactured hooks and super-producer beats! Every track lives, breathes and resembles the soul of the man behind the music.

Get ready to groove...



My Personal Picks.
Smoke One: I don't even get down with the green but the melody on this joint makes you wanna puff and pass...
Words: India.Arie joins him to jam... nice single definitely.


BUMP OR DUMP?
Bump it. I promise you won't regret it!

Tracklisting and joints after the jump.

TRACKLIST
1. Stop Playin
2. Something About You
3. Smoke One
4. Words
5. Lady
6. Spittin Game
7. Kinfolk
8. GA Peach
9. Cheatin' Man
10. Cold Turkey
11. Krooked Kop

ENJOY!


Click To Download

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The Smart Files: Kommen Sinse Says - Sometimes It Be's Like That

by Kommen Sinse

I was sorta having a mental crisis when deciding what to write about. Was I gonna write about what I originally wanted to do? Which was the Male Guide to Cheating the Smart Way or write about all these entertainers kicking the proverbial bucket? I decided to just talk a little bit about last week. First Ed McMahon died, then Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson died, then pitchman extraordinaire Billy Mays dies. Seriously, this was a bad week for entertainment. Now I was talking my highly offensive opinionated friend Royal King about Michael's death. I hit him with a text and let him know what has happening.

Kommen Sinse: R u watching the news?
Royal King: No....i'm on 2. [the bike]
KS: Mike just died.
RK: Mike who?
KS: MICHAEL JACKSON nigga!
RK: Which 1? Blk Mike died a long time ago.
KS: How u gonna say sum shit like that?
RK: Easy. U kno it's tru. The man was a music genius, but he wasn't all there. Nt hving a childhood'll do that 2 u. Besides he was bleached.
RK: Besides, he's still alive 2 me. His music still go hard.
KS: Tru.
RK: $100 all they talk about is neg shit. U kno how the media does it.
KS: They already doggin him.
RK: Oh well....he's n heaven wit Pac, Biggie, Marvin, Frankie, Sammie D, JMJ, Big L, Big Pun, getting bent.
KS: LMAO!



Anyway, RK hit it on the head when it came to the negative. They hopped all over it. Sad really that a man so great died in nothing but controversy. You never really knew how big of a role he played in your life until one of his songs comes on and you get to singing it. So many good times in your life can be linked to that man. I went to a Michael Jackson concert long ways back, to see the love those people had for him was crazy. He will be missed...both of them. [RK you are a damn fool. Now I see why no one likes your ass....LMAO! I texted him that and his reply was: I wasn't put here for people to like me knee-grow....LOL! Good write though.]

I'll tell you what though, All the Farrah talk ended the moment that dude died though. Farrah was my first wet dream for real. It may be TMI, but damnit if she wasn't fine as hell when I was just figuring out how my paynus works. In fact, I credit Farrah for making me realize I love women. I saw her, my dick got hard. I see ladies that looked like her...my dick got hard. She hung around for 4 years fighting cancer. Gotta love the spunk in that Angel.


Anyway, I wasn't gonna take up too much of your day, seeming as how, I can tell yawl already don't do shit at work. If yawl had the time to read this, I know yawl don't work. I'll do the Male Guide to Cheating the Smart Way next week. I got all these tips from the ladies fellas, and believe me this shit is interesting. Until next time yawl....

Rest In Power

Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson & Billy Mays

Monday, June 29, 2009

Smart Music Mondays, The MJ Edition.



Normally, this is where I have Radhu's ill mix of the week and an album review of my own but this week is a bit different. Music lost an icon, an ambassador of greatness in melody, a trendsetter in every sense of the world, Michael Jackson.

My man, Dame from This May Concern You, wrote a great letter to Mike:

Dear Reader,

When I first heard about Michael, I broke down for a few moments as if I knew him. A tear or two fell. I sat there somber, hoping against hope that someone would shake me awake. But as the minute hand crept closer to due north, my hope waned. Reality set in. He was gone.

Like most, I didn’t know what to do. I watched CNN, MSNBC, MTV and BET simultaneously while refreshing my browser tabs for the LA Times, CNN.com and a few other media Web sites throughout Thursday night. I talked to as many of my close friends as possible. I checked on my mom. I started Facebooking and Tweeting his songs and videos. From “ABC” to “Butterflies.” I watched videos from the classic era from “Thriller” to “Scream.” Finally, I calmed.

I came up with the Five Random Questions because I didn’t think I wanted to write anything. I wanted everyone else’s thoughts and reflection. But I felt I needed to write something. So I started reading again — because I couldn’t write. I started trying to write, then stopped. Then I read some more — because I didn’t know what to write.

Michael doing what he did best.

Michael doing what he did best.

Then it hit me after I came across these specific words from Vibe Editor Danyel Smith’s piece on CNN.com: “It comes down to the fact that Michael Jackson gave. Whether he chose to or did it because it was all he knew, he sacrificed himself in the name of his art.”


What did I think of when I read this? Fear little. Love big. Give more. Expect less.

The middle two, Michael knew how to do without pause. Hell, sometimes he gave too much and put himself in precarious situations (we all do that, right?). Fear little and expect less? He knew how to do them, but didn’t always follow through. That showed in and because of his eccentric nature, utter weirdness and the awkward accusations.

Sure, Mike was a Peter Pan come to life. He built Neverland Ranch and never wanted to grow up. Like Paul McCartney said, Michael was a manchild. But isn’t that what we’re most attracted to anyway, where we tend to find the most joy … in children, especially those that cease to amaze? Are we not sucked in by their gravitational pull like our feet are to this earth beneath them?

In retrospect, Michael Jackson is the one true child star whose post childhood star exploded through the universe like a comet. And we got to witness the changing landscape of Michael’s comet throughout the 80s and early 90s before it began to flicker.


He kept moving us and giving us greatness, reason to stay tuned or tune back in. He gave most of us greatness in our youth. Whether it was us 70s and 80s babies or our parents. Most of us have our own childhood stories of Michael. They’re fond cherubic memories that we still carry.

I remember watching people pass out on television as Mike performed. Sometimes, he would just walk through a room, and a woman would drop mid-scream. I couldn’t understand it, but I knew then that he moved people like few others did.

I remember mis-learning the words to “Man in The Mirror” and singing them with the deepest conviction in front of my mirror at 8. As I said in the FRQs, that’s my favorite Michael song, because it tells you where you can find yourself and how you can start to make a difference — through self-reflection. Sound familiar? This whole self-reflection thing has been rummaging around my core since I was 8 — because of that song.

Most of us have similar experiences. And maybe that’s why Michael is on our hearts the way he is now in death, because we’ve carried him with us for so much of our own experiences.

And now we’re finally accepting the enigma we had for 50 years for what he did. He gave each of us who listened, learned and loved everything he had to give. The better. The worse. The best. And the worst.


Most of us marveled at his genius. But some who gazed also gawked at the unmistakable absurdity of his eccentricity, his troubled soul and his alleged exploits. We all taunted, jeered and/or questioned him at one point or another. Some swore and/or wrote him off “forever.” On Thursday, many of those people soiled their faces with tears and their hearts with sorrow as though they were his most loyal fans. Yes, there are plenty of unrelenting people full of hatred that don’t quite get it.

But there are more former taunters in Michael’s comet-viewing coliseums around this world — mourning, reflecting and celebrating his life.

...

...

Why? Because they knew the manchild’s greatness, too. It’s undeniable. Many of them lived through the 80s and watched Michael transform from black boywonder to “I don’t know what he is, but he’s larger than life” global icon. As Michael altered his complexion and facial features, they — the taunters — knew that he was half-crazy. But they also knew he was half-amazing. They knew Billie Jean wasn’t his lover.

They, like us, wanted a glittery glove. They wanted a red leather zipper jacket. They, too, wanted to Moonwalk like a Smooth Criminal. And on Thursday evening, they began mourning, like us.

Some of us ponder why? Why should the people who turned their backs on Mike for so long be allowed to celebrate him now that he’s gone? Why should they be able to switch sides, and throw roses at his feet in death.

Well, why not? Let them change their minds, and allow their heart’s longing to sing “Remember The Time” force its way through their ridiculous, yet re-convicted vocal chords. Now’s not a time to hate. It’s a time to be grateful that we were able to witness.

It’s a time to reflect and realize that the man moved a race — the majority of the human race — with his songs, his voice, his weirdness, his nerdiness, his movement, his style, his grace and his words. But mostly, he moved us because he was himself and he gave us the best and worst of who he was.


He did so from his youth until he was a grown manchild. Very few, if any, of us can say that. His life was the unadulterated, unscripted version of The Truman Show. And the world watched. It’s still watching now.

Maybe, in death, Michael Jackson is an enigmatic macrocosm of life trying to force us all to see a man for who he was in his completed, crazed state. To see the flaws despite the triumphs and the triumphs in spite of the flaws. Yet, in the end, enough of us still choose to love him for what he gave us.

That’s just what I see. Maybe I’m overthinking it like I do everything else. I don’t know.

What I do know is that I’m about to find my brush, turn on “Man in The Mirror,” head to the bathroom mirror and sing my heart out because that’s how I first learned to find myself. Through self-reflection in 1988.

And it’s time to remember and reflect some more. We miss you, Michael.

Peace be still,


Damon



I'm posting my two favorite MJ albums. Hope you enjoy.





Tracklisting:

1. Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
2. Rock with You
3. Working Day and Night
4. Get on the Floor
5. Off the Wall
6. Girlfriend" (McCartney)
7. She's out of My Life" (Tom Bahler)
8. I Can't Help It
9. It's the Falling in Love
10. Burn This Disco Out

Click To Download.



Tracklisting:
1. Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’
2. Baby Be Mine
3. The Girl Is Mine (with Paul McCartney)
4. Thriller
5. Beat It
6. Billie Jean
7. Human Nature
8. P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
9. The Lady In My Life

Click To Download.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

beneficial friendships.



We've all been there; that long, seemingly endless drought during which time you get no play, no action, none of that sweet, that good, that gushy stuff. The single life is mundane, and you've got no viable prospects. Some take matters into their own hands (in West Virginia, many descend into the arms of a sexy sibling). You start to think to yourself this can’t be for too long, I’m quick-witted and too attractive to be single. This thought permeates throughout the corridors of your mind (seeping down into other regions within your body) until you decide there are no other viable candidates. You’re desperate to see any feasible candidates and you decide to try a new route aptly-titled “friends with benefits” (or the part-time lover).

You know how it starts: one day, you’re with your friend, and notice how he/she is attractive [or fill random trait that makes you horny] and how great you interact. Next thing, you know you’ve stained some sheets with whipped cream and exotic oils, laying in the wet spot wondering how in the world you got into this mess.

YOU: What in the hell just happened?
THEM: What in the hell just happened?
YOU: It was good, though.
THEM: I can’t believe we did this.
YOU: Ooh, that was good.
THEM: This will ruin our friendship.
YOU: Let’s do this again ‘cuz this felt really good.
THEM: We shouldn’t be doing – but it felt so right.
YOU: I hope this doesn’t mess our friendship but it was good, though.
THEM: I’ve always wanted to make love to someone who could be my best friend.

Generally, this situation usually doesn’t end up at the altar (but we continue to paint the fine line of friend and lover). The part-time lover finds its origins in some breakup many years ago. It started with some dude, who was sick of being “trapped” in a relationship, sick of some female’s crap yet still feenin’ for her brown sugar, voiced a proposal, an agreement, if you will. Sex without relationship complications; totally need-based, not emotional like what those other suckers are doing; just for a little while. It's the perfect plan. Kind of like a severance package for his package, until it finds “new employment” (almost like a staffing agency, you know, temp-to-hire).

The mistake didn't lie in the idea, because people come up with stupid ideas every day. Attempting to have sex with your ex isn't exactly innovative, either.

The mistake, avid My Two Cents.™ readers, is that he or she agreed to it.

This novel thought opened a new escape clause for anti-relationships everywhere. Sex with no strings; the multiple-night-stand; the part-time lover (hell, even Stevie Wonder could see that was a great deal). In later years, the part-time lover made way for other dating loophole innovations like Revenge Sex and the Late Night Booty Call…. but I digress.

So here you are, still bitching about not being able to find someone special, but now you have a big ol’ Kool-Aid smile on your face.

Why?

You’re getting some of that oohwee, that makes me wanna holler, that sexual healing, seeing how Stella really got her groove back (you know before the closet opening, no Lance Bass).

In order for the part-time lover plan to work, there must be rules in place. You must both be single. You're probably not getting any from anyone else; otherwise you wouldn’t be looking for the part-time lover. You can't get emotionally attached, jealous, needy, or any of that crap (SIDEBAR: fat chance of that happening). You probably try to keep it a secret, too. And, most of all, you can’t let it interfere with your (or your friend's) dating life.

You know what?

With all those rules, it starts to sound a lot like a… relationship or worse, a JOB.

In theory, it's like finding a bag of money. You can’t believe your luck and you probably don’t think to ask yourself [INSERT INNER MONOLOGUE: "Self, where in the hell did this money come from?"]. Your dumb tail is just happy you ain’t broke right now. You can't believe that you're the only one who thought of this. No anniversaries to remember, no hearts and flowers, no explaining where you were last night, you're in heaven. But as we all know with money (and love/lust), you never know when it's all going to run out.

Disaster comes into play when one of the two friends in the agreement is harboring feelings (it just takes one). Think about it, any friend who would just concur to start having casual yet semi-exclusive sex (especially with you) has to have an agenda of their own. The fact that they look at you, lick their lips and fondle appendages is a give-away too. Chances are they not are fully aware of it themselves (these account for 90% of the part-time lover files). With this being said, when the drought is over, and the emergency the part-time lover rations can be put away, that pre-existing crush is enough to cause immense (yet, swift to you) jealousy and the victim is your platonic, un-awkward, normal friendship.

That's assuming you're good (and compatible in bed) which can lead to another kind of adversity.

What if you don't click in bed?
What if you chicken out as soon as they get naked?
What if you end up laying there saying "what the hell did we just do"?
What if you can't finish?
What if you can't even "rise to the occasion"?

These are things that start to mess with confidence and self-esteem. It also makes for an awkward game of Who Wants To Play With The Pudding Pop UNO next time you two are hanging out alone (assuming that you're even able to be alone together after that point).

Then there are the resentment issues. Eventually, someone will start to feel like the other person's back-up booty. Sex without all the relationship-type stuff leaves you a lot of time to think about what you just did, especially when your love interest just jumped up to play a video game or to call the guy she's really interested in.

It's rare to find someone mature enough to have continuous sex and not develop feelings for them. It's even rarer to find someone who can deal with those feelings if and when they show up. In the end, you've got feelings (i.e. awkwardness, jealousy, resentment, and all the other things) that can stop a relationship dead in its tracks (by the way, a friendship is a relationship). And it sucks more than Jenna Jameson that the relationship that got you into this mess, can make you end up losing a lover AND a friend.

In essence, in trying to avoid headaches, you back your way into migraines. You're stuck. You're solo again, this time; you’re bored as hell 'cuz you don't even have your friend to call on. But sometimes, you look over at that other person and realize that you're having sex with someone you like to hang out with, who likes all the same stuff you do, who knows all your secrets and still wants to hang out with you. Sometimes, they realize it too. Then things work out and you get to twerk it out…

Have you ever been in a friend with benefits situation?
If so, can/does it work?
If not, why not?

That's my two cents – let me know your thoughts...