Heart To Heart.

Today, I realized... I'm getting old. I now have to watch what I eat, I ache sometimes for no reason and I find myself yelling at people to turn their music before they go deaf. This, my friends is not a good look.

One good thing about growing older aside from the impending windfall of Social Security checks and senior citizen discounts is getting wiser. You begin to appreciate more things about life. In the last few years, I've slowed down and really started to be thankful for my health, my continued employment and my ability to text and drive good friends. I've also noticed that my people are growing up too. All my boys are getting settled down and/or starting families - and that in itself makes me proud. With all that being said, I just want to take time to say a little something to someone special.

To my yet to be born child,
I hope you're doing OK. I just wanted to take a little of your time to pass on some of my "knowledge".

I apologize in advance for anything I do to embarrass but best believe, it's gonna happen. Grandma used to embarrass me all the time.

Feel free to tell me when my attire is going out of style or start saying slang that is a bit outdated. I'll be sure to let you know when I have no idea what you're talking about, which will be a lot.

Don't smoke. Don't drink the last of the Kool-Aid. Don't curse (well, at least in front of me).

Remember that even if things don't work out between your mother and me, it will not change how I feel about you. I've been proud of you since the day I made you. It's clear I've passed on my athletic genes to you as you obviously are a good swimmer cuz you beat everybody else to Mom's eggs!

I won't force you to do anything you don't wanna - ok, maybe I might but it's probably for your own good.

At this point, I don't know if I'll still be the cool guy in your book or that annoying dude that keeps cramping your style but either way, you'll eventually get over it.

Dads aren't perfect and as smart as you are, I'm sure you’ve figured that out. I make mistakes all the time, I probably like to hear the sound of my voice too much, lose my patience over little things, say un-cool things that make you roll your eyes and probably drive you crazy at times, but I mean well.

I promise you that I'll be there for you whenever you need me. I'm gonna be at every practice, concert, recital, camping trip, parent conference that I can be - not because I like it but because I wanna support you. I'll try my best to chase away your pain as well as give you an overload of smiles on a regular basis.

We can talk about whatever you'd like - just be mindful that I'm a bit limited when it comes to certain areas. If you're a boy, we're good. Know that it's OK to fight back but use your words as weapons first. Also that, when you're 12 and you see the girl next door blossoming and you end up thinking you've peed the bed - it's cool. Just wash the sheets and talk to me later. If you're a girl, you're not allowed to drive or date until you're 25 and I'm deathly afraid of cramps and other feminine functions. Any other questions, ask your mama.

I'll let you have cable - no child should have to suffer without it. Only your grandma would wish that evil on someone. By the way, she's a really nice lady who is a sucker for a cute face so smile a lot and ask for money. You might come up on a small fortune.

Be respectful to others but most of all, respect yourself first.
Treat others as you'd have them treat you.

I hope you'll forgive my failures. I know that I will fail sometimes. I will make mistakes. I'll say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing or make the wrong choice, and I'll hope you'll love me anyway, and forgive me because after all I'm only human, just like you.

Well anyway, that's all I got. Just want to thank you for being such a gift to me.

I love you.
- Dad

PS - Please don't put me in a home, force me to watch Soul Plane or have Harpo beat me.


That's my time. Have a good weekend.

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