Monday, July 26, 2010

The Bootleg Hitch Chronicles, Numero One.

I'm pleased to introduce a new writer on board and he's well-versed in the affairs of the heart. He's pretty knowledgeable in the game. I would say more but I'll let his words do the speaking for him. Give some love to the BootLeg Hitch! - Mr. Smart Guy

Allow me to introduce myself - I like to call myself the Bootleg Hitch. I've got great advice for men and women minus the money and sculpted physique of the fictional Hitch character, hence the bootleg version. Anyways, I see a deficit in good advice for men and women who are any type of relationship (from marriage to booty calls) but mainly, my advice will focus on the pursuit of relationships. Let's get to it.

The number 1 question I get from guys:

"How can I be certain to get those digits?"

Such a loaded question, but a great one. By far, the most difficult task is the first one. So many things have to go right for this to happen but it's far from impossible. Follow these simple steps and you will increase your odds to definitely north of 50%

1. The hygiene game must be on point.

It is amazing how many guys fail themselves on this one alone, which merits an automatic disqualification for women faster than a wrestler using a chair in an old WWF match.

A shower, mints, cologne, and a decent line are minimum requirements. No woman wants to know that you train monkeys for Ringling Bros. by the time you finish your first handshake.

2. NEVER approach a woman in a group of 3 or more without a wingman...

Like raw meat thrown to a pack of hyenas, you are asking to get eaten alive. The ratio of women to men can never be more than 2:1. Trust me, I've done the research.

3. ...unless you are going to give her a compliment and immediately walk away.

This is a technique rarely used but highly effective. The compliment puts a smile on her face, gets her to notice you, and when she inevitably tells her friends what you said, they put the knives away. On the flip side, you don't have to stand there and fight for attention while the other friends look at you with the evil eye for not choosing them, and if she likes you, she will make certain you get the opportunity for some one-on-one time.

4. Pay attention.

This piece of advice is of the utmost importance. Notice what drink she is ordering. Watch who she is watching, what she is laughing at and if she is grooving to a particular song. Use it to your advantage. Nothing will impress a lady more than if you can see she is grooving to Prince, walk over and discuss his value as a great artist, then ask her if she wants another drink and ordering it BEFORE she tells you what she is drinking. It means you cared enough to pay attention, and all women want someone who notices the small stuff.

That’s all for now. I'll be sharing more with you all in the coming columns. In addition, any questions you want answered for your truly - by all means, please post to the page.

Were these tips on point, people?

Let me know what you think...

The BLH (BootLeg Hitch)

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